06:55 pm
Controlympics: Oh No You Dint Fidel!
Yesterday, I blogged on the decline of the Cuban Olympic team’s performance, and speculated that Castro wouldn’t talk about it.
Silly me.
Here is some of what he said in Granma today. His doctors might want to think about increasing his oxygen ration. Translation via (and hat tip to) Cuban Colada:
Regarding Angel Matos, the Cuban tae kwon do guy who kicked a referee in the face, Fidel says that Matos did the right thing:
The referee suspended the fight when [Matos] was winning, 3 to 2. . . . Amazed by a decision that seemed to him totally unfair, he protested and aimed a kick at the referee. His own coach had been the object of a bribe attempt. He was predisposed and indignant. He could not contain himself. . . .To our taekwondo athlete and his coach go our total solidarity.
So maybe I was wrong — maybe Matos can run for vice president. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that a man who can rationalize human rights abuses will find a kick to the face wholly unpersuasive.
Regarding Cuba’s dismal performance in boxing, which is usually a strength, Fidel had this to say:
I saw when the judges shamelessly robbed two Cuban boxers in the semifinals. Our boys [...] hoped to win despite the judges, but it was futile: they were condemned in advance. I did not see [Emilio] Correa’s fight; he was also robbed. I am not obliged to keep silent about the Mafia. It managed to evade the rules of the Olympic Committee. What they did to the young men in our boxing team, to complement the job of those who engage in stealing Third-World athletes, was criminal. In their viciousness, they left Cuba without a single Olympic gold medal in that discipline.
I decided to give Fidel the benefit of the doubt on this one, so I checked who were the winners of boxing gold medals. Here are the countries whence the gold medal-winners came:
Capitalist Running Dogs and Their Lackeys:
- Italy
- Ireland
- United Kingdom
- Ukraine
Friends, Comrades and “Third World Athletes”
- Kazakhstan
- Russia (2 medals)
- Mongolia
- China
- Thailand
So your final score, ladies and gentlemen: Comrades 6, Running Dogs 4.
Gee Fidel, the “Mafia” sorta screwed themselves, didn’t they? Especially when you consider the fact that three of the four Cuban losses were to “Third World Athletes.” And for the record, the Cubans did win eight medals in boxing, just not any golds.
Regarding baseball, Fidel said that Cuba’s performance was “exemplary” and that the South Korean team, which beat Cuba in the final, was “an excellent team.” But he blamed the decision to drop baseball from the Olympics on “the interests of the big commercial corporations” [sic].
As opposed to, say, the big corporations (and the IOC) dropping baseball because that commercial corporation, Major League Baseball, is refusing to release its players in the middle of the season. If MLB actually ever did that, it would hurt the chances of the Cuban team, which no longer would find it significantly better than the rest of the amateur world. That’s exactly what happened during the World Baseball Cup last year.
Fidel closes with a preemptive strike on London 2012:
There will be European chauvinism, referee corruption, the purchase of muscles and brains, an unaffordable cost, and a strong dose of racism.
That’s not exactly a ringing vote of confidence in your national sports programs: we’re going to suck and it will be the capitalists’ fault. Except for the tourists who pay all those Euros to visit our lovely prostitutes beaches.
Fidel also should go back and watch the U.K. section of the closing ceremonies. The British are doing way too much ecstasy to try any of these things.